A guide to effective tips for chatting with girls you've just met
In This Guide
- One, start the conversation with a light topic
- Two: Listen carefully and respond positively
- Third, share your own experiences to bring you closer together
- Four, humor to resolve embarrassment, active atmosphere
- V. Avoid sensitive topics and maintain a comfortable atmosphere
- Six, control the rhythm of the chat, end the conversation at the right time
- Ending smartly and making a promise for next time
One, start the conversation with a light topic
Find topics from the current environment
When meeting in a café, you can say, “The lattes in this store are so exquisite, every cup feels like a work of art, do you come here often?” This kind of opening is both natural and lets the girl feel your power of observation and attention to detail. Or if you meet them in a bookstore, you can say, “I just saw a book about the mysteries of the universe here, the cover is especially cool, do you usually like to read this kind of popular science books?”
Use shared experiences as an entry point
If you met at a friend's party, you can say, “That game was hilarious, your reaction was so witty, you almost won!” This can evoke your common good memories, so that the girl is more likely to open the box. Or after attending the same training program, you can say: “Today's training teacher talked about that case is so interesting, how did you understand that knowledge point?”
Open the conversation from daily life
Share the cute little animals you saw on the road, such as: “I saw a super cute little kitten on the road today, chasing a butterfly all the time, adorable my heart, have you ever had a small animal?” Or encountered a wonderful scene, such as “I saw an uncle on the subway wearing a super exaggerated hat with a feather on it, especially eye-catching, have you ever met this kind of interesting people in your life?” This will arouse her curiosity and make the chat unfold in a relaxed atmosphere.
Two: Listen carefully and respond positively
Focus on listening and responding
When a girl is talking, put down other things in your hands, look at her with focused eyes, and listen carefully to her share her views and experiences. Nod your head and respond with words or actions such as “yes indeed” and “and then”. For example, if she mentions a drama she's been following lately, don't rush to interrupt and wait for her to finish before commenting, “Listening to you, I feel like this drama has such a fascinating plot and the main character's persona is so interesting that I kind of want to follow it!”
Capture details to deepen the conversation
Paying attention to capturing details in her words and mentioning them in the follow-up chat will make her feel that you value her. For example, if she mentions that she likes a certain book, you can ask, “That book you mentioned, was there a plot in it that particularly touched you? Can you tell me more about it?” This will make the conversation deeper and show that you care. If she mentions that she likes a certain kind of food, you can say, “The signature dish of that restaurant you mentioned sounds delicious, is there something special about the side dishes in it?”
Share interesting and positive experiences
While listening, you should also share your own experiences and ideas to improve mutual understanding. However, it is important to keep a good eye on the degree of sharing, and avoid over-telling or showing off. Choose interesting and positive experiences, such as a memorable trip or the process of learning a new skill. For example, “On my last trip to the beach, I tried scuba diving for the first time and saw colorful corals and small fish at the bottom of the sea, it was an amazing feeling, have you ever had a similar experience?”
Combine points of interest to find resonance
When sharing, you can combine her interests to find common topics. If she likes photography, you can tell the story of how you recorded your life with a camera: “I've recently started to learn photography, and the last time I went to the park to take pictures of the cherry blossoms, I couldn't get that kind of pink and tender feeling, do you have any tips on how to take pictures?” Let the chat produce more resonance.
Four, humor to resolve embarrassment, active atmosphere
Timely humor and flirting
Humor is the lubricant of chatting, which can effectively relieve tension and embarrassment. Appropriate light-hearted jokes and responses in a flirtatious tone can make the atmosphere relaxed and happy. For example, if she mentions that she's not very good at something, you can say, “Looks like I've found an organization, and I'm a ‘novice’ in this area, so we can form a ‘rookie league’!”
Watch your humor
Avoid vulgar, offensive jokes, and make sure your humor makes her feel happy, not uncomfortable. If you're not sure if a particular joke is appropriate, start by observing her facial reaction. For example, if you want to make a small joke that she looks like a cartoon character, look at her attitude towards the cartoon character before deciding whether to open your mouth.
V. Avoid sensitive topics and maintain a comfortable atmosphere
Choose your chat content carefully
When you are just getting to know each other, you have to be careful about what you choose to talk about and avoid sensitive topics such as income, relationship history, family privacy, etc. These topics can easily make the girls defensive and destroy the atmosphere of the chat. If you accidentally talk about the content that she is not willing to mention, you can notice her mood change in time, and skillfully change the topic: “By the way, when it comes to this, I suddenly remembered that I recently heard a superb song, what kind of music do you usually like to listen to?”
Keep it light
Keeping the chat relaxed makes her feel comfortable and at ease in the exchange, so that she is more willing to continue chatting. You can use some easy expression to assist the expression, for example, when she talked about happy things, send a smiley face expression; when the atmosphere is a little bit dull, send a quirky expression to liven up the atmosphere.
Six, control the rhythm of the chat, end the conversation at the right time
Control the length of the chat
In the process of chatting, we should learn to control the rhythm, do not continue to chat for too long, especially for the first time. Generally speaking, it's better to keep the initial chat at about 30 minutes to an hour. When you have shared a lot of content with each other and the atmosphere is pleasant, ending the conversation at the right time can leave her with a feeling of unfulfilled desire and lay the groundwork for the next chat.
Ending smartly and making a promise for next time
For example, you can say: “It's been so much fun chatting with you, I didn't realize we'd been talking for so long! I'm afraid you'll think I'm too long-winded to continue, so let's talk again next time.” When you end the conversation, you can also make a simple promise for the next time, such as: “Next time, I'll share with you the hilarious photos I took during my trip, and I guarantee you'll laugh until you can't stop!” Make her look forward to the next chat.
Mastering these tips for chatting with girls you've just met can help you navigate through the exchange and easily close the distance between you and her. If you encounter any other problems in the actual chat, feel free to discuss ways to deal with them with me.